Dear Julia,
We are celebrating your 4-month birthday in Tahoe. We just arrived today. It is beautiful. It has snowed just recently and the trees are all covered in white. I wish we could be experiencing it together. One of the things I longed for you to do was be able to feel the snow on your little nose. I can't even imagine how even more beautiful Heaven must be. I'm just so happy you are not suffering any longer. But I miss you. I can't help but wonder what you would be like if you were still with us. I bet you would be smiling by now.
I can't believe it has been a month since your memorial. You are in my thoughts every day. In some ways it seems as if forever has passed since you went up to Heaven. Life has a way of trudging on no matter what. But there are moments when I just long to hold you again. To look into your eyes again. Your sister, Mattie, has not forgotten you one bit. Every night at dinner when I ask what she is thankful for she says she is thankful for sphinx, our cat, and you, Julia. You are almost always a part of her daily play. She considers herself the big sister even now that you are gone. That makes me very happy. I am so sad that you did not get to grow up together. It was one of the strongest desires of my heart and still is. Mattie still loves you very much and I know she always will. Your daddy mentioned your birthday today. He was thinking of you, too. He also mentioned that he was sad you were not here.
Oh sweet baby. Sweeter than this world could handle so God took you up to be with Him. I love you so much. I miss you so much. I just want to love and kiss you.
Happy birthday, my daughter.
Love,
Your mommy.
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